- student: hey government can I have some money to go to university
- uk government: sure here you go. you'll have to pay it back but only when you're earning £21,000+ a year, and if you don't pay it off after 30 years we'll just write it off, don't worry about it man
- scottish government: nah man just go to uni we ain't gonna charge you
- us government: no. you gotta pay it yourself. upfront. your parents have to save up from the moment you're born. good luck, fucker. you have six months after graduating to start paying loans so you better pray to fucking god and jesus that you have a well-paying job by then or be prepared to be fucked up the ass without lube.
my mom made these like brownie cupcake things and they look like just normal brownies but then you take the wrapper off and
mother fucking chocolate chip cookie
but that’s still not all. take a bite and
THAT IS A GODDAMN OREO ON TOP OF A CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE AND COVERED IN A BROWNIE THIS SHIT IS LIKE EATING THE FUCKING TEARS OF GOD YOU TAKE ONE BITE AND YOU HAVE SEEN THE LIGHT YOU WILL BELIEVE BECAUSE THERE IS NO WAY THIS MAGIC IN YOUR MOUTH WAS NOT SENT FROM THE HEAVENS
Is your mum Jesus?
when she says she doesn’t send nudes
when guys objectify women and expect them to send nudes
when someone asks you about your nuclear plans for russia
When Russia sends you nudes
I thought I was in a bad mood
and then I saw this.
this can pretty much make everything better
HERE YOU GO FOLLOWERS
Yes, yes, this makes everything better.
Reasons I love the internet more than people
you forgot one
I CAN’T ESCAPE ALLO PEOPLE SOMEONE HELP
wow bing and you wonder why people don’t like you
- me: What you do think about the princess marrying another princess?
- her: Instead of the prince?
- me: Instead of the prince
- her: So her daughter would have two mommies?
- me: Yes
- her: two princess mommies...
- her: fabulous
have you ever loved a lyric so much that when you hear it feels like your heart is trying to burst out of your body
Getting valentine’s in elementary school vs. Now
ONE OF THE GREATEST VINES EVER